Wherever you turn, you see poop, manure, and garbage. We’re a species that smears everything with our fingers and continuously shares that with others. Take a moment to look around you. Every surface you can see almost certainly has human poop on it.
It’s probably invisible to you, and most of the time it’s present in small enough amounts and concentrations to not endanger people. Nonetheless, it’s still shit, and it’s still everywhere.
According to this article, here are 15 places with more poop than you think.
Researchers from the University of Arizona claim that the smartphone in your pocket has ten times more poop bacteria on it than a toilet seat. Every time you text, it’s like thumbing a whole stranger’s rectus.
If you frequently drink from shared office cups, congrats! Your body is being filled with the waste of all of your coworkers’ anuses. You are essentially getting paid to eat excrement because of your coworkers’ clumsy wiping and shoddy cleaning.
Visiting a hotel? If your favorite channel is someone else’s digestive system, don’t touch the TV remote. Remotes can hold as much waste as a real toilet. In addition, there is a lot of splatter on every surface in a hotel room.
The touchscreens that McDonald’s gleefully uses to reduce customer interaction and the need to pay for services are essentially laminated in poo. In a UK investigation, poop was discovered on every screen that was swabbed from eight branches.
While chlorine is used in swimming pools to combat bacteria, it is not a magical substance that instantly kills germs, so there are still plenty of poop particles floating in the shallow end. Swim diapers are useless, according to the CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention).
Poop is always present, even if you don’t actively poop on the bed. Your sheets are more like bedshits.
Most toothbrushes are kept in the same room as a toilet, which means that you are rubbing human waste into your gumline twice a day. Every time you flush, the “toilet plume” phenomenon spews poop out of the toilet.
The next time you use an ATM to withdraw money, remember that it is also depositing money on your fingers. The green contains brown.
In 2011, New York Magazine swabbed the seats of NYC taxicabs and discovered that the massive number of passengers that have ridden in them had left behind poo and yeast from both the vaginal and anal regions, as well as other bodily fluids.
When restaurant menus were swabbed for bacteria in 2010 by Good Morning America, they were discovered to be more contaminated than salt and ketchup packets, which are frequently touched by hundreds of people.
According to some research, elevator buttons may contain thousands of times more bacteria than a toilet seat.
A BBC investigation in Britain discovered excrement germs in the ice used by McDonald’s, KFC, and Burger King. That means your Sprite now contains the poo of a clown, a colonel, and true meat-based royalty.
Some butthole bacteria persist when dirty underwear is placed in the washing machine; the drum of your washer is only dookie-free when you run a clothes-destroyingly hot wash or bleach everything to death.
According to a 2007 survey, 70% of lemon slices served in pubs and restaurants had at least a passing familiarity with poo-poo.
According to a 2011 study published in the journal Applied and Environmental Biology, whenever you breathe in an American city, you’re taking in teeny-weeny particles from someone’s bowel movement.
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